The Name Game: Mr. & Mrs.

image source

I know a lot of women go through the name debate of changing their name, especially now that more women are getting married later, once they’ve already established themselves in a career. I’m not that old (22) and not that established (what, you hadn’t heard of me?), but I still feel a bit of attachment to the name I’ve had my whole life. If you don’t know already, facebook announced a week or so ago that they’d be allowing usernames for easier access to profiles (you can send them a link to facebook.com/theirusername , a lot like twitter.

Since I’ve been getting into the photography business now, while I’m still unmarried, and have my maiden name, I struggled over naming the business, knowing I’d be married and changing my name. The web address for my first name and maiden name is mysteriously on backorder and my first name and his last name was some guy who likes to fish. I felt like my full name + photography was a lot to type in, and since I was so unsure of my identity I decided to go with something different.

So my business is Spindle Photography, mostly because I really like the aesthetic sound of spindle. And as a bonus it is whimsical and fairy-tale esque. Problem solved, right? Not really. I’ve gone my whole life as my name and I used it for my twitter username, my facebook username (will I regret making that decision this morning? Maybe. I could’ve gone the route of the big famous unmarried photographers like Jessica Claire and used my first and middle name. But my middle name is Scott so it would probably seem like I was stuck between three last names. Plus, I’m not famous. I’m sure it’s not that big a deal, people change their names and business names all the time and come out fine.

I like the ring of my current name, and my new name will be alliterative, and it hasn’t sunk in yet since I’ve only been mistakenly called it maybe twice (and oh, I sure got goosebumps, it’s exciting!) I like the new name, but even Garrett has thought about us creating our own new last name, (he also says his name is Gideon at restaurants, so if you work at one and get a Gideon, party of 2, come by and say hello!), and so far there’s Maus. Kelly Maus sounds really cutesy though, right?

I’d be interested to hear if any other business owners have struggled with the name change. I could just tack on his name to mine for the sake of business cards and facebook I guess. But how do you become a new name when you know everyone looking for you thinks of the old one? Is it not that big of a deal? Do I just suck it up?

The whole concept of the name change is interesting to me. I’ve always thought I’d change my name when I got married, so that’s never been the issue. My feminism is mild and does not stretch that far. If you don’t want to change, I think that’s fine and really acceptable now. My grandmother was so sure that my mom would get married that she didn’t even get a middle name. And about the middle name, I don’t like that it just drops out. I want my name to legally stay the way it is with the new last name added on, and Amelia informed me that when she went to the SS office hers did, which makes me feel better. I also have a weird pet peeve about calling a couple Mr. & Mrs. John Doe. I’m sorry, but I won’t be a female version of my husband. I am taking his last name, not his identity. I prefer Mr. & Mrs. Doe, or Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Doe. Does that make me insanely weird, or does it irk anyone else?

I know this post must sound bizarre, like I’ve clearly lost my mind. You’ll remember from my previous posts that I have. That wedding planning has driven me nuts, I have lots to do, and I’m kind of an avoider. But, I have the veiling for my birdcage veil, and that is progress!